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Tera, an environmental specialist III, shares about her journey of coming out at work
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Do you think twice about sharing about your weekend plans with your colleagues at work? For most people, giving details about their personal life comes naturally, but for some it isn’t as easy. Creating an inclusive workplace where everyone is accepted can help employees feel comfortable bringing their full selves to work.“What are you doing this weekend?” Take a moment and think about your answer to this question.
In the summertime, your answer might include taking your husband and kids out for ice cream, a long weekend with your girlfriend to the beach, or getting together with your family or friends to grill out.
You’ve likely faced the “weekend plans” question from a colleague or your boss at work more than once. It’s a quick, easy and seemingly innocuous way to connect with your coworkers through a topic that doesn’t involve your day-to-day work.
It’s a question so routine that your response probably doesn’t require much consideration but for some, that isn’t always the case. For LGBTQ+ employees who have not come out at work, this question can be an uncomfortable one; their response carefully crafted to hide a part of their identity.
Tera, now an environmental specialist III, navigated this when she first began working at Dominion Energy as a contractor in 2015.
“It takes energy to hide your true self,” said Tera. “Of course, we are all putting energy into being professional, but pretending to be someone you’re not, or being careful about what personal info you share in addition to that, is exhausting.”
Tera shared an example:
“Before I shared my full-self at work, I would be asked about what I did last weekend or if I had any plans for the upcoming weekend, and I felt I had to be vague about my answer. I’d share that I went to a new restaurant with a friend, which wasn’t really true. I had been to that restaurant with my girlfriend.”
At least one of her coworkers noticed that she didn’t share much about her personal life at work.
“I was questioned by a coworker, who thought it was odd that I didn’t speak much about my life outside of work,” said Tera. “In that moment I felt a sense of panic, but I told her my truth – I have a girlfriend. I’m gay. I didn’t think it needed to be said or should be said, but this coworker sincerely wanted to get to know me.”
This experience opened the door to sharing personal details with more of her colleagues, who expressed full acceptance of Tera for who she is. Tera notes: “Everyone shares about their life at work, except for people who feel that they can't. It’s a leap of faith, whenever someone comes out to you, so be kind.”
When asked about what advice Tera has for those wanting to be an ally in the workplace, she says: “Show interest and ask about their partner after they share about them with you — just like you’d ask anyone about their wife, husband, girlfriend, boyfriend, family, etc. And know that this isn’t my entire identity, there are so many layers to everyone.”
Dominion Energy’s Code of Ethics expects employees to create and reinforce an inclusive, creative and productive work environment in which everyone feels accepted and respected. The company’s harassment policy also protects workers from harassment related to a person’s sex, sexual orientation and gender identity or expression, as well as race, color, ancestry, gender, pregnancy, religion, national origin, age, actual or perceived physical or mental disability, medical condition, genetic information, military or veteran status, marital status, status as a victim of domestic violence or any other classification protected by law.
Beyond fostering a culture of inclusivity, the Human Rights Campaign has named Dominion Energy as a “Best Place to Work for LGBTQ+ Equality” with a score of 100 for the fourth consecutive year. This recognition highlights employers who have taken concrete steps to establish and implement comprehensive policies, benefits and practices that ensure greater equality for LGBTQ workers and their families.
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